The past four weeks, I have decided to take on a whole new life style. I have given up my favorite "comfort foods", I have incorporated more of an active lifestyle, and keeping positive. An all around healthier life, I have been so much healthier and I have found such a happier place. However!!!!!! I miss my comfort foods, and I miss my other happy times, I know that I would be so disappointed in myself if I did cheat. So discipline has become a bitter sweet battle. It has been a battle every single day, I have been so hard on myself not to break and just splurge! I know the emotional and mental let down if I do will be way worse then a$$ kicking of a work out I would have to do just to make up for it!I have tried to diet in the past and work out in the past, and was never able to stick to a strict diet and keep up with self motivation. However, in the past I have done it for all the wrong reasons, I never did it really for myself. It took me to smack rock bottom a few times, to actually get it this is not okay because its just not healthy! Now, I am terrified I am going to fall... yet just this weekend one of my strongest supporters broke, and gave in. In a way it was a relief, because my mindset was that if I broke then I would be letting others down. Yes, he broke and gave in, and got right back up the next day and said " OKAY! that was shitty moment lets get right back on track". Watching someone else go through it made me realize that I will have breakdowns and its completely normal and it happens. It doesn't matter how hard we fall, its how quick and strong we decide to stand back up. It was so awesome to know that its okay, it doesn't need to be the end of the world if I do, I won't let it define me. I have broken bad habits before and am in the process of replacing them with good rich healthy ones, and it feels awesome! The powerful feeling I get after I work out, the awesome full feeling of eating better, treating my body better, it says more about who you are and how you hold yourself. At first, it was all about looks for me, I was tired of not liking the way I looked, and so I wanted to change it, now that I'm not so worried about what I look like and more worried about how I feel and how healthy I am has changed me myself so much more then I could ever expected. I am really starting to love me, and for the first time smiling comes easy instead of a trick. I am so proud of myself with the progress that I have made, and even though I do not plan on falling, or slipping, its only human if it does happen, and it wont be the end of the world. I will just simply decide that it happened label it just as it is, and stand right back up!
"Every moment you are happy is a gift to the rest of the world" Harry Palmer
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